people’s behavior probably masks some much more deeply held beliefs (in the sense of repressed thoughts). People do not so much try to defy nature or evolution as they try to cover up their own fears or discomfort with feeling small or insignificant. They do not want to go out on a limb and risk being laughed out of the room.
You said my last post made you go ‘Ooof.’
I have to say, you questioning whether we use dating apps as a way of coping with our feelings, made me go, ‘Oooof.’ Quickly followed by a ‘Mother fucking Ooof!’
Because, I know you’re right.
What I have become painfully aware of, however, is I try to use the apps as a way to cope with the alone-ness of being single, but it doesn’t actually work. And in fact, it actually turns a not that lonely me into a lonelier me.
So I came across this Tim Ferriss post the other day, where he suggests that instead of making New Year’s resolutions, you conduct a past year in review—a chance to reflect on what you did in 2019 that was positive and led to positive feelings, versus what you did that was negative or led to negative emotions.
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I’ve never been one for hugely inflammatory or click-baity titles. I generally opt for Simpsons references and alliteration to attract readers, as it makes me feel smart and important. I can appreciate how the title “Nobody actually fucking cares” would seem to break this trend, as it alludes to Dan having regressed to the emotional state equivalent of putting Sum 41 lyrics in his MSN status; let me assure you though, this is an uplifting piece.
Of course people care. They care about their jobs; they care about their families; they apparently care about their eyebrows a lot these days for some reason. There are plenty of things in life worth caring about, and far be it from me to judge what those things may be for any given person.
What they probably do not care about, is you.
Oh sure, your Mum cares about you. Your siblings probably do…
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Is a question that I ask myself quite a bit. I don’t do evil things, at least I think so. Yet I still can’t squash the conflict in my head as to whether or I not I am. I’ve always tried to be an extremely introspective person, ever since I discovered the meaning of the word. Whether I am successful in that conquest is not something I believe I’m qualified to answer. The question of my designation more than likely resides in the fact that I can’t mind my own business, and the fact I can’t leave a question unanswered.
Most humans see themselves as the hero in their own story. It’s extremely difficult for a person to accept that something was a result of their own actions, showcased specifically in car accidents. Sure, it’s an insignificant situation. Sometimes though, car crashes can be fatal. Especially drunk driving. Most car…
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big 5 , big five , psychology , self improvement , social skills
Disagreeableness isn’t a curse or a mark of a demon. In fact, it’s a valuable trait for making friends and getting ahead in your social life.
I know I should write a better introduction, but fuck that. We’re on my turf here. I don’t want to put effort into this introduction, and you can’t make me.
Acknowledge the value of diplomacy and tact
Honesty doesn’t have to be brutal, but it has to hurt sometimes. Life is pain (but not always).
Hitting people with brutal honesty then claiming “I’m not an asshole, I’m just honest” is a dick move if you get validation from the brutality as much as from the honesty.
Unless you’re on the autism spectrum, you have the natural ability to read social cues that inform you on how to behave. Use it. There’s no point in unnecessarily crossing boundaries or pissing people off to fuel self-righteousness.
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Oreokidronaldo, The Column
I don’t like the word “deserve” (that’s probably a different discussion for a different day) but I believe that in this context it’s useful: You don’t deserve to tolerate actual disrespect.
Ok, but what does that mean? Like if you’re getting roasted and you’re just sitting there not trying to roast back, I’m not talking about your bitchass. Lol.
That’s not disrespect.
I mean that when someone takes you for granted and makes you feel like you’re replaceable or goes out of their way to make your life harder for their benefit. Disrespect.
I’m a strong believer in the “#WeAin’tShit” movement, maybe its not a thing and I just made it up right now, but it basically stands for everybody is of equal value, so that means nobody’s presence is that valuable that you should tolerate them making you feel less valuable.
Now if it was as easy as just…
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