"The hardest thing in life isn't getting what you want; It's knowing what you want."

Dear KB,

You said my last post made you go ‘Ooof.’

I have to say, you questioning whether we use dating apps as a way of coping with our feelings, made me go, ‘Oooof.’ Quickly followed by a ‘Mother fucking Ooof!’

Because, I know you’re right.

What I have become painfully aware of, however, is I try to use the apps as a way to cope with the alone-ness of being single, but it doesn’t actually work. And in fact, it actually turns a not that lonely me into a lonelier me.

So I came across this Tim Ferriss post the other day, where he suggests that instead of making New Year’s resolutions, you conduct a past year in review—a chance to reflect on what you did in 2019 that was positive and led to positive feelings, versus what you did that was negative or led to negative emotions.

And…

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Rant: Blame the Teacher, not the Student

manual, millennial, rant, transmission

What Does Phil Know?

I’ve been brainstorming writing this for a while. I’ve got a lot of friends in the generations above me, and have heard a lot more millennial/young person hate showing up more and more, especially when it comes to car enthusiasts. A lot of that is the nature of the social media machine, but at the same time, y’all gotta take a step back and think about your actions that helped cause this.

One particular item that grinds my gears is the car enthusiasts’ hatred of “kids that don’t know old car stuff”, especially the “millennial anti-theft device” aka the manual transmission. I know I’m a relatively rare exception, but both my wife and I know how to drive a manual transmission, and we’re both millennials.

I’ve seen too many memes and articles about botched car thefts due to a younger person not knowing how to drive manual. But way too…

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The Oblivious Little Adventurer

Chuyện của tui, Nhạc nhẽo

skyblue12697

When I was in pre-school, I asked for books on traffic laws and animals biology. I just wanted answers. I wanted to know more.

I also wandered around the neighbors in elementary school. Turned out the area I walked around was kinda sketchy. But I didn’t think much. I just wanted to see what’s out there, and then make my way to my friends where there would probably be banana pancakes.

Right around 2010, Paranormal Activity 2 came out. I remember being at my friend’s house, and we would watch it on her TV screen with maybe 10 or so others. I remember how noisy we were, and how it was comfortable surrounded by so many that even if a spirit came to drag one of us, the dozen of middle schoolers there would be able to fight back. I also remember I didn’t look at the screen that often…

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How does your environment shape how you see and use the world around you?

Diversity, Gender Equality, Monuments, Participation, Public Advertising, Public Space, Social Inclusion, Street Furniture

Dr. Mary Dellenbaugh-Losse

Much of the work that I have been doing recently has concentrated on various facets of this question:

  • Inventing Berlin asks how street names and monuments communicate who should feel like they belong in the urban landscape,
  • A revised version of my essay for the Hacking Urban Furniture project examines the normative aspects of street furniture and how that shapes how we use public space, and
  • My new role as lead expert for the URBACT action planning network “Gendered Landscapes” will explore the gendered aspects of urban planning and urban life.

To get academic for a minute, there is a social constructionist assumption at the core of all three of these works: the environment shapes the subject, in particular when aspects of the environment become banal, invisible, or taken for granted.

The environment around us is not simply the process of natural, environmental forces. Especially in cities, the environment which…

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